NAME IS BOND - JAMES BOND
James Bond talks.... An imaginary selfie
BOND IS BACK AGAIN....
and the latest Bond film, Spectre,
is certain to be an enormous
box-office hit (as all the others). This is the twenty-fourth film
about James Bond. He's an amazing
guy... he doesn't look a year older than he did over fifty
"My name is Bond. James Bond.
But you knew that already, didn't you.
Everyone knows that, which is rather a pity in ways. After all, I'm
meant to be a secret agent, no-one's really supposed to know who I am.
I should just be James to my friends, and Bond to the rest. My bosses
in London call me 007.
Still I don't suppose it really matters
if everyone knows who I am; I'm just proud to be the best, the most
exciting and the most seductive agent in Her Majesty's Secret Service.
Actually, I'll let you into a secret.
It's not surprising I'm such a good agent — I've got so much
experience; you know, I've been in the job since 1952. Not bad, eh!
It's obviously good for the health, this job, because I don't look or
feel a day older than I did when I first joined up just after the
Second World War. Quite amazing
really, isn't it?
In those days, the world was a dangerous
place; there were Reds all over the place, trying to steal
and machines that would control the world! I made sure they never managed
. I had some
pretty hair-raising moments at times, of course, but I came through it
all without a scratch. No
they're proud of me!
Do you remember the trouble I had with
those dangerous megalomaniacs
like Auric Goldfinger and Dr. No? When I look back on my younger days,
I sometimes feel that I'm very lucky to be still alive. Actually, the
more I think about it, the more I realise how incredibly lucky I've
Officially, you know, I'm "licenced to
kill"; frankly, I think the job description ought to say "licenced to
be killed"; I've quite lost count of the number of times I've brushed
with death. I suppose I must have a charmed life. Maybe it's something
to do with my Scottish ancestry. I know, anyway, that I'm liable to
from one day to the next. Any job has its risks, I suppose —
and I certainly wouldn't be seen dead doing a boring job in an office,
like some of my superiors. Men from the Ministry! Huh!
Perhaps you'd like to know how to become
a secret agent like me? Well, honestly, it's partly a question of background
one of character.
My father was a Scotsman, who loved
adventure; unfortunately his life wasn't as charmed as mine, and he
died in a climbing
accident when I was 11. That was a tragic moment for me, but I made up
my mind to lead the sort of life that would make him proud. Of course,
I got a good start. When I was 13, I was sent to school at Eton,
England's most prestigious public
; that's the place where Prince
William and David Cameron both went to school. Half the boys in the
school went on to become important people — MP's
, diplomats, top
government officials and businessmen and so on, so I got a lot of
useful contacts. As for playing cards, well that was strictly forbidden
at school, but the less we say about that the better!
My school also helped me move easily in
high society; you know, wearing a bow tie and a dinner jacket comes
quite naturally to me, as that was more or less our school uniform!
Then of course, there's one other thing
that has ensured
my professional success: looks! In the olden days, I always used to say
"You can tell
an enemy agent a mile off! She's the most beautiful girl
of all." The idea was quite clever, really. The beautiful girl was
meant to seduce me, so that I told her my secrets; the trouble was, in
actual fact things usually happened the other way round. I must have
broken a lot of hearts!
One day maybe, I'll retire
, and get a knighthood
doubt. Sir James Bond. Sounds good, doesn't it!
Well, I'll leave you now, I've got to go
over and have a chat with that Daniel Craig fellow over there. You
know, he takes my role in the new film . He looks the part,
don't you think! He's got some Scottish blood! Probably has a charmed
life too, like me. Perhaps he can tell me how Hollywood found out what
I've been up to. I thought my missions were meant to be secret."
astonishing - steal:
procure - managed:
succeeded - no wonder :
is not surprising -
person who wants great power - I'm liable to:
may well be -
mountain climbing - public school
private school - MP's:
parliament - ensure:
certain of - tell an
recognise an enemy - retire:
stop working -
the title of "Sir"
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Correct the mistakes
After listening to James Bond talking about himself, one of our trainee
reporters was asked to write a short article about
Mr. Bond. Unfortunately, he made a number of mistakes (about 16). Can
you pick them out and correct the resumé, changing or adding
words as possible.
James Bond is the most productive agent working for the British Secret
Service. He's been in the job for over thirty years, as he first joined
in 1952. He says that the world was a dangerous place in those days.
For most of his career, he tried to help
Reds stealing nuclear bombs and machines that would control the word.
He often got hurt, but he has come out alive in spite of all his
adventures. He believes that he may have a charming life, because his
ancestors were Scottish; but he would not like to die working
in an office.
Bond's father died in the mountains
while young James was a pupil at Eton, a very famous English public
school. His school helped him to get a good start in life. Lots of his
school friends were diplomats and government
officials and so on, so he made lots of useful contracts. At school, he
also learned how to wear a bow tie.
During his life as a secret agent, the
Enemy kept sending beautiful girls to seduce him; but Bond talked to
them when they were a mile off, and in the end he told them all his
secrets; but now he's looking forward to retiring. He is not at all
happy with Daniel Craig, who plays his part in Spectrum, the latest
James Bond film.
Interview with James Bond
Many of your students will have probably seen at least one James Bond
film. Ask them to talk about Bond, the character, and the Bond
phenomenon. Are James Bond films out of date? Are they as exciting as
more modern thrillers?
What have your pupils learned about Bond
from this article? After they have read it, ask them to write down six
"factual" sentences about Bond.
This article is in the form of a spoof interview. Have students work in
pairs and convert it into a question and answer session.
EFL teachers: Help develop this resource by contributing extra teaching
materials or exercises.
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Revised 2015 . Originally published in Freeway,
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